RYL006 – Think on These Things


Think on These ThingsWe had a wonderfully fantastic weekend that included our very special granddaughters. We enjoyed movies, chick flicks (I think Kendall even enjoyed them too) and had roast and mashed potatoes one of their favorite meals. For dessert we had caramel apples and I loved them. Yesterday JoElla went to the Coats Garden Club. It was a fun day with making Christmas ornaments and turkey and dressing. Everyone seemed to have a lot of fun. And can you believe the size of that sweet potato.

Did you ever get into a situation and find you had been lied to – by someone you thought you could trust – and you find out that it’s YOU! 

You might not call it a lie it might be called misbelieve or an erroneous belief or misdirected belief. Let’s give an example. You might say, I can’t do anything right. You’ve just burned the toast and the day before you added too much salt and now you feel as though you cannot even cook. But at the end of the day you made a beautiful pie and it turned out yummy. So what I’m saying is there is no truth to the statement I can’t do anything right.

What if we told you that we all can change the course of our lives by training ourselves to actually be aware of what we’re saying to ourselves, evaluate the reality of what we are listening to, and simply change what we’re saying – hence changing what we believe.

You might ask yourself how did I get into a negative pattern of thinking. It does happen little by little for example we might say I just can’t be happy until I know that everyone likes me. Another negative pattern comes from – I won’t be fulfilled or happy until I get this job or position.  The truth is what we believe comes not from the circumstances but from what we think about the circumstances of our life. Our information comes from our emotions or what we believe others are thinking about us and we really have no clue what people are thinking. This kind of bad information causes us to think of ourselves and others negatively.

You might ask where do those thoughts come from? Well, we are targeted all day long by marketers trying to defeat the image we have of ourselves so we will improve our image by buying their product. An example of that is a commercial on TV, they try to convince us we are lacking or unattractive. You know, not skinny enough or not beautiful like the models they show us. This is one way we compare ourselves to others. When we have those negative thoughts and keep them and then we put ourselves at a consistent disadvantage in our healthy, positive thinking.

What should we replace our current thoughts with? We do need to renew our minds and replace poisonous thoughts, misdirected thoughts with thoughts of good and goodness (Whatsoever things are true, good, pure, lovely, noble, just, of good report, think on these things. Phil. 4:8). That is such a good list and when we find ourselves outside of this then we must be believing something outside the nature of God! Think of who we really are in Christ – what are the benefits of our sonship in Him.

So, some antidotes to our thinking:

I’m so stupid – we have the mind of Christ 1 Cor. 2:16

I feel all alone – I will never leave you. Heb. 13:5

I can’t figure it out – I will direct your steps Prov. 3:5-6

Its impossible – all things are possible Lk 18:27

Nobody loves me – I have loved you with an everlasting love Jer 31:3

I can’t forgive myself – I forgive you Rom 8:1

Im not smart enough – I will give you wisdom 1 Cor 1:30

I understand all that but now long will it be until I see some results from my efforts. It’s not like at broken bone that has to take time to heal. Once the bad thinking is taken away, it’s almost instantaneous. We reduce the compounding effect, once we start to recognize thoughts that are trying to defeat us. We take it away, fewer negative thoughts are diluted with thoughts of who we really are and then we start to see results. The old patterns of our thinking have to change when our thoughts change.

Really that is the good news. The other new is that sometimes things have to work out that we have caused bad to happen. You know what we have to overcome is what has been set in motion because of our bad decisions that were based on those bad thoughts. Have peace in the fact that we can start to see the end of what you’re suffering and that can be the end of a crazy life.

You CAN change. You may be convinced that you won’t or that you can’t and if you are convinced you probably won’t but remember you can have what you believe.

I have to ask, is this like behavior modification? NO! Our behavior changes but it comes from the inside out. When we believe the right things we move toward behavior that is godly and principled – in the life he wants for us. His thoughts for us are Good and not for evil.

So were starting to see where some of our problems might be coming from. We can recognize where negative thoughts might be coming from and how to start rooting them out. We now start to renew our minds to God’s word and the fact that we are not subject to all the negative stuff that is going on out there – it’s not what he promised us- it’s not our heritage.

But it is our responsibility to change our minds – to change our thinking- no one else can do it for us. It may seem like we are in a battle and all the forces of evil are against us – but most of our woes are self-inflicted.

Half the battle is recognizing what we are really thinking. We can change what we are thinking and we can make good decisions with good information. This will put us on a straight course.

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RYL005 – There’s “One Thing” We Know


OLYMPUS DIGITAL CAMERASunday after church we went to Scooters Grill & Bar to hear our friend Pete Terano and the Little Big Band play some old Rock & Roll favorites. We had a great time with friends and the food was great.

JoElla had lunch with Ally and dinner with Savannah. This weekend we get to add Victoria to the mix with all three for a sleepover. It’s a great time here in North Carolina.

Last week we talked about the “One Thing” reference from City Slickers the movie we follow us with some questions from Jude.

She writes:

Just finished listening to your 004 episode and would like to post a question here:

I have been doing what I thought was that ONE thing God has called me to do for about two years. Within these two years I had been promoted three times and the money has gotten better and better. I truly felt that I was created to do this job until recently my passion started to dwindle and I began to question whether this is really the ONE thing or not.


How do you stay passionate about what you do?

How do you distinguish between God’s calling for you and what might be your own?

If you have the talents and apply them nicely to your profession and have tremendous desire to do it, does that automatically make that profession your calling? In other words, just because you are good at doing something, does that make it that ONE thing?

So we invite you to listen to our responses. Just to let everyone know, we’re not counselors. We just hope that in this podcast God speaks to your heart. We have lots of experience but our hope is that we all learn to hear Holy Spirit for ourselves.

When we use the term “call on our lives” what does that mean? Is it just ONE thing. Is it a  CALL? Is it CALLINGS, plural? What is the “ONE THING”? There is ONE THING we know:

His pleasure comes from knowing that we find our one pleasure or purpose in Him. Our calling or callings may NOT be just “ONE THING”. After all, it’s not so much about who or what we become, anyway. Our purpose is being IN Him.

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RYL004 – Employment, Does it Help Define You or is it Your Identity?

Copyright: smileus / 123RF Stock Photo

We Love Autumn!

JoElla stated that Autumn is her favorite color. And Kendall asks, “Could it be?” It has cooled off here but that’s not the whole of why we love Autumn. It’s such a feast for the eyes. Here’s a pic of the mums that the Guy at the Food Lion gave JoElla last weekend.


Fall Says Mums.

Our friend got a job after looking for one for some time. She wanted one that would add to her life and be enjoyable. What an exciting time. We think of a job in so many different ways. We might think of how a job fits us but don’t consider the money. And at other times we only think of the money part of it. Sometimes we go to a job that we hate, all the time feeling unfulfilled. It’s just hard. We find the best job is the one that we get fulfillment from but the danger in that is having the job we like so well is that it might becomes our whole identity. So maybe the balance in all that is that our job might help define us but it doesn’t have to give us our self worth or be what we choose as our identity. We have to choose. Work is honorable and plugging into a fulfilling job is very wonderful. But it’s in God that we have our self worth. We have a purpose beyond what employment can provide.

Copyright: stockbroker / 123RF Stock PhotoWhat is within you to do in life that would really be fulfilling? What is that ONE thing that I would want to do? Would we want to be a short term missionary. That may be a stretch for some. It might be something so big that we couldn’t think of achieving it. But God can! Choose something only God could do. Every time we think of that ONE THING that God is wanting to do through us we would think of Jack Palance in City Slickers with Billy Crystal.

Go find who you are!

Our goal is to encourage people through our podcasts. Although our friend found her job some of you might still be waiting on something to come to pass. Who will encourage us? When we don’t have someone around us we always have the Lord through Jesus Christ.

Sometimes in our search we are rejected or we might have failed to reach a dream and feel like something is just keeping us from “our” dream. We fail to realize that no one is out to defeat us and God is not trying to teach us a lesson or punish us. It’s not the devil. The devil has been defeated. And the best thing is that God loves us. God doesn’t want to defeat us for ANY reason. We might have come against a simple closed door. Our response should be not to give up on our dream but to continue knocking on another door.

JoElla continued to talk to her friend who said she’s praying that God will be with her. Well, that made JoElla remember one of our teachers in Bible college. He told us to look down to our chests. He told us that we had asked Jesus into our hearts. And He’s still there because He said He would never leave us. He will be with us through anything we are doing or going through.

We know stuff comes against us. We will have tribulation. David in Psalms spent lots of time in caves with people chasing him wanting to kill him. Psalm 43 in the Message says it the best,”Why are you down in the dumps, dear soul? Why are you crying the blues? Fix my eyes on God— soon I’ll be praising again. He puts a smile on my face. He’s my God.”

So our job is to think of good news don’t always watch the bad news. Put your hope in Him lift our countenance and receive a message of hope in Him. To quote JoElla, “He changes the inside of us and it comes out on our face.”

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RYL003 – It’s a Heart Thang


Fall Photo from Diane in Indiana

We had a great week here in North Carolina including our church picnic on Saturday. You might remember autumn being our favorite time of the year. JoElla found another photo that tells the story of fall. Our dear friend Diane in Indiana took the photo near her home and allowed us to share it.

Sunday was a treat as we spent time with Arthur Meintjes. He spoke at our church in the morning and we got some sit-down time in the afternoon. He has agreed to do an interview with us after we get some technical things worked out on this end. His ministry is Kingdom Life Ministry.

Arthur 1

Arthur Meintjes – Kingdom Life Ministries

This week we go back to our rationale for choosing Reclaiming Your Life as a title/theme for our podcast. It’s really exciting to see how the inspiration came to our choices. God intervened in the process to bring some things out of our hearts that we were able to put into the format of our show. We had a definition for ‘reclaim’ but didn’t realize how well it fit our mission until JoElla revisited the word from a different source. We share how simple it is to reclaim our lives but how it may not always be easy.

Old ideas and ways have to be replaced with the Truth. That doesn’t mean we go to the scriptures and find a set of do’s and don’ts. We find out who we are, who we’re meant to be and how much God loves us, His creation. That’s the standard we set for ourselves. It doesn’t matter what we see in the mirror or what our history points out to us in a condemning way. We’re who He says we are. And that’s a result of our redemption and that has nothing to do with what we can contribute to our betterment. Having faith in that, or being fully convinced of who we are allows a heart change. Then our life circumstances can start to change.

Not GuiltyWe promised a link to a song we love that shows us clearly who we are in Christ and how God thinks of us. We’re refreshed every time we listen to it. Here you will find the story of how Aaron Keyes wrote the song. We hope you enjoy the song, You’re Not Guilty Anymore and hope this is a great week as you find your way to Reclaiming Your Life.

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RYL002 – Who Do You Think You Are?


Welcome – Autumn is my favorite time of year! Around our area we have dogwoods turning a little red and then we have soybeans that are golden. We also have on one side of us sweet potatoes. They haven’t been harvested yet but we are looking forward to when they are.

15807265_sThanks for all the comments and encouraging words we are so grateful for each of you. We really love hearing from you and need your input. You can share a need or an idea for an upcoming show. All the comments really encourage us.

ABC had a great segment one day last week and it was all about Keith Newman, CEO of Residential Education at Wesleyan University. During the Chapel service he decided to act out a sermon he had heard.”Do for one what you would like to do for everyone”.

 First he made sure all the students and faculty had a card as they entered the room and then he ordered 2 pizzas. The Dominos delivery driver James Gilpin was the one that delivered those pizzas. The ticket was $12.50.  When he delivered the pizzas he was escorted on to the stage. The people, students and faculty had been told ”Do for one what you would like to do for everyone”.  The crowd went wild when he got on stage since they knew they had collected cash and gift cards for the tip which resulted in about $100 in gift cards and $1,248.68 in cash. Some that didn’t have any cash gave a gift a card they had and some were only able to give the note with an encouraging word to the delivery driver.  You see Newman asked faculty, staff and students what they would like to receive as a tip and act accordingly. But not to feel compelled to do so.

So many times we look around and see so many needs and often feel condemned because we can’t help all that are in need. We get overwhelmed, even paralyzed and don’t do anything. So what is it we can’t do for everyone but we can do for one person?

Gilpin said, “I thought it was very nice for an average Joe like me to get something like that.  They didn’t know me from Adam, and they just picked me out random and handed me the money. It was really nice.”

He plans to fix some things around the house, fix his car and start shopping for Christmas for his 5 and 6 year olds.

What a great lesson!

Gilpin never supposed he would have experienced what he did at that chapel service. It was no accident that he was chosen. And those who poured their love out on him found the lesson for that day was so much more than academic. They were able to define who they were by realizing WHOSE they were.

Our life DOES have meaning when we say there is none. We do have purpose. We have an identity even if we haven’t discovered it yet.

300 BC – Aratus writes “in Him we live and breathe and have our being” Essentially he states, “we are, to be sure the offspring of God Himself”

Our full definition is to be found in Him. WE LIVE – BREATHE – HAVE OUR BEING – IN HIM. Paul,in Acts 17 reminds a gathering of Greek philosophers that the God their poets sought was always near us. He’s in us.

We don’t have to believe it because it’s in the Bible or a greek philosopher said it – but doesn’t it ring true in our hearts? Even as we consider it, don’t we know we’re part of something bigger than all of us?

We came from the intentional and calculated, loving desire of God. And even nature teaches us there are no duplicates of us. Even identical twins differ. We’re unique and in Him we have a one of a kind purpose.

Being alive is what all the students and faculty experienced as they gave to the pizza delivery man. For the rest of their lives they will on occasion think and experience this and tell the story about it. Finding a place like that to plug into – people to share our lives with, sharing our resources with – that’s living. That’s life. We encourage you to JUST LIVE.

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RYL001 – Entry to Podcast Land and Why We Didn’t Tell


This Week in Our Lives

Track meet — Savannah “runs like the wind”

Breakfast burritos – we announced the podcast to our family except the college student

Then Saturday evening dinner – Victoria didn’t get to go with us early in the day – we told her about the podcast – NOW ALL THE FAMILY KNOWS. College life is busy this week with her play Shakespeare’s Measure for Measure

Birth MONTH for Ally – Lunch on Wednesday for her birthday with Savannah

Saturday for the real birthday party – A BONFIRE!


How Did We Get to Podcast Land

We asked ourselves the same question and found it hard to remember. The last 6 weeks were such a blur. So we remind ourselves how we got here and let you in on the story.

We try too hard to fill others expectations for us and come to a place we have to break out and move toward what we see as our purpose. We prayed and God has shown us a way to express what He has put inside us. So we planned to do a night-at-the-coffee-shop discussion group and wanted to support it with information on a website. That’s where we found michaelhyatt.com and the encouragement to blog and create an online platform for people who need more information about us. Continuing our research, we found Cliff Ravanscraft at podcastanswerman.com and started learning about the viability of podcasting as an effective vehicle. We were hooked on how we might be able to encourage others by our failures and successes.

In a month-long class we found the tools we needed to create a quality sounding show that we are sharing with you now. We could have done it by fumbling around the web looking for how-to answers but chose the class with Cliff. As intense as the entire month was I am still glad we chose to do his class. It may have shortened the time it took to get on line by as much as 3 or 4 months.


Our Studio on a Folding Table

The Importance of Goals in Your Life

We have failed dismally setting goals for our lives, except for New Year’s Day every year or so. And although we may have set them, we rarely wrote them and certainly didn’t follow through.

So we found a great primer about goal setting on michaelhyatt.com. It was tremendous help starting our podcast. In a few words here’s are the 5 principles he follows setting goals for himself:

1)  Keep Them Few in Number

2)  Make Them “SMART”





Time Bound

3)  Write Them Down

4)  Review Them Frequently

5)  Share Them Selectively

You’ll find more details here.

Why Didn’t We Tell Anyone?

Michael Hyatt had an article talking about how if you share your goal with others even though they love you and want the best for you your goal is less likely to be accomplished. When you share your goal you get the gratification and sometimes that is all you need. Then you don’t even care if you follow through. Your mind tricks you into thinking the work that has to be done to accomplish your goal has already been done so you are less motivated.  We decided to try out this method. Wow! It was really hard and sometimes we wanted to share it but we both knew we could not. Part of the reason it became easy was we would need to explain what a podcast is to many people and that would take time and energy. We just knew this was the way to go and it really became fun and exciting as we worked our “plan”. We needed to surround ourselves with people that could help us achieve our goal so that is when we knew the PODCAST ANSWERMAN was the person. Cliff and our classmates were so good about helping us and giving us not only the information needed but lots of encouragement along the way. So you see there were lots of people that did know but they were the right people!!

Topics Covered In This Episode:

Our wonderful week with our granddaughters (00:47)

The last six weeks and how we got to podcast land (03:54)

The importance of setting goals for your life (12:21)

Why we didn’t tell anyone about our goal (19:12)

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RYL000 – Inaugural Episode of Reclaiming Your Life

Kendall & JoElla

Kendall & JoElla

RECLAIMING YOUR LIFE is a show about LIVING. We all have some regrets in our past but there IS life after disappointment. And there IS life to be lived. This is THE show about getting back the life that we were designed to live. It’s the show about discovering the uniqueness of our purpose.

In the first episode of RECLAIMING YOUR LIFE we talk about being  a married couple with lots of life experiences. We have reacted to life by going the high road and we have traveled the low road. How do we “come out on top” when things don’t seem to turn around?

We have been to bible school and found some great relationships along the way. We found that most truths are NOT verbalized but lived out daily as you invest YOUR life in the lives of others. Besides it’s not about a bunch of rules, but realizing God’s love.

We live near our family and are blessed to be in the lives of our three beautiful granddaughters and of course, our daughter and son-and-law. We are REALLY proud grandparents but we hope to balance our obsession with our granddaughters  and not cover you up hearing about the wonders of our life around them.

We look forward to have you with us weekly as we interview guests, such as authors,  public figures and our most favorite people, regular joes. Topics will be about community, family matters and marriage, remarriage, children, divorce, abortion – BUT all with the emphasis on coming out of difficult situations with hope and a future.

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